DESIGN YOUR LIFE
The Overwhelming Nature Of Choice & Why Going With The Flow Is Sometimes Better For Mental And Physical Health
I’ve been reading a lot lately. i’ve always been a fan of a good wellness or philosophical book – in fact, its a weakness of mine. My regular amazon drip of mindful living, beautifully illustrated, self help books is a deeply embedded addiction. It’s less about ‘finding answers’ and more about self exploration and general understanding … and a pathological need to buy things.
Anyway, my latest reads (and still to read book pile) covers everything from The School Of Life: An Emotional Education, The Power Of Now, Miracle Mornings and The Secret, to Yoga: The Mantra For Life, Mindfulness Journals and every book on Zen living ever made.
I love the practices they preach, I love understanding more about human behaviour and psychology, and mostly I love the positive intent towards creating a life of better balance. The possibility and power to design your life and create a 10/10 design in all areas – health, love, career, wellness etc.
During lockdown i’ve been reading more and more, and as you well know by now, have been thoroughly thriving in the work from home set up – so much so, i’ve been thinking about how to design a life that facilitates the balance we’re getting a taster for now, permanently.
But what I’ve come to realise in the last week or so, is how overwhelming ‘choice’, ‘purpose’ and designing a dream life without limitation can be. It sadly forces you to be dissatisfied with what you have, to focus on ‘more’ and to believe deep down you can have anything you want – which I don’t disagree with (PMA all the way), but, innately throwing everything open to choice and decisions can actually be quite overwhelming. What if it’s the wrong choice, what is the right path? I’m an over-thinker, worrier and stress head by nature and what i’ve realised, is that whilst I love the premise of many of the books I’ve read lately, and I of course would love to maintain some level of flexibility and have more of the things I love in my daily life (yoga, time out, travel etc), ripping up what you have now and have worked so hard to achieve, isn’t always the right answer.
If you’re happy – you don’t need to rethink everything. Instead of paralysing yourself with choice and a million alternative lives you could lead (because if anything is possible, then anything is a go-er), simply think about doing more of the things you already love doing.
Design Your Life, but perhaps with some parameters.
SOME OF MY FAVOURITE WELLNESS BOOKS & JOURNALS
For me, this means alongside my thriving in my job and career that I truly do love (and wouldn’t want to leave despite the standard working hour restrictions), finding better balance and making time for the other things I love – blogging, reading, yoga, travel, relaxation. Yes maybe one day i’ll own a wellness store (packed with the books, journals, stationary, wellness products & mindful living tools for others to buy) and even have my own coastal retreat for others to use, to spend time unwinding and re-finding their own balance (putting it out there, might help it become a reality); for now simply finding my own utopia (balancing my career, my health, my happiness, my passions) and sharing my learnings on my blog with you, is absolutely perfection.
Choice and unlimited access can be really quite stressful if you’re not clear on what your ‘purpose is in life’ or perhaps you’re actually happy and don’t need a total 180 or a life purpose to give you joy. From my experience, simply going with the flow has bought me tons of joy and success.
I realise now my ‘Human Design‘ strategy and ‘not self’ themes are undeniably true – for me, waiting to ‘respond’ to opportunity has always been my opportunity driver, not seeking and forcing things to happen, and when i’m not in a good place, and trying to force things I end up over thinking, fixating and causing myself stress. NB: If you haven’t discovered Human Design, it’s another mind blower – combining astrology and chakras, it’s like horoscopes on steroids, but I’ve found it quite reassuring and a good guide for when I do start to overthink of worry (and freakily accurate).
So for anyone else on the ‘design your life’ bandwagon – don’t over think it. Sometimes gratitude, taking time to reflect and focus on some small tweaks to your life is really all you need … and those big things might just flow in time.