HOW TO START LIVING THE LIFE YOU ACTUALLY WANT TO LEAD

Live The Life You Actually Want to Lead Today.

You may have noticed that a lot of my lifestyle editorial in 2017 to date has been about living well, setting goals for a better life balance, admitting struggles on the quest for perfection, and finding ways to be more mindful everyday. I’ve said it before and i’ll say it again, editorials on mediamarmalade truly come from my heart and as such they’re often reflective of the things i’m thinking, feeling, struggling with. More often than not my blogging tips or lifestyle tips are written as much to help me as they are to hopefully inspire or help you too.

So it goes without saying that the editorial focus on wellness and creating a lifestyle that fits your life goals and career ambitions this year to date, is something I’m truly striving to achieve this year. Work, Life, Health Balance. Once & For All.

Yes I failed at first (well in all honesty i’ve been failing to find that balance for the last 4 years), but after a well timed two weeks adventure in the philippines, I have the opportunity to start a fresh, re-set, set my boundaries again, agree some principles for my life and make sure I commit this time around to giving less fucks to the things that aren’t either in my control, making me happy or helping me live healthily (aka life balance, stress, getting active), and more fucks to the things that matter to me.

Time to truly master the art of happiness. #notsorry.

So today, I thought i’d start the working week with a little something to help inspire me, and you, to truly start leading the life we want to lead, and actually making sure it happens!

THREE STEPS TO HELP YOU LIVE THE LIFE YOU ACTUALLY WANT TO LEAD

Your Basic Happiness.

Happiness doesn’t have to come from material things in life, nor societies norms (like marriage, material possessions, salary & promotions, the things that often we can get caught up on without truly thinking if they really fuel our own happiness). Understanding what actually fuels your basic happiness is really important if you want to lead a content life everyday, because that should become the basis of everything you do!

I wrote a whole article about defining your life KPI’s last year (if you want to set yours then definitely check it out), but ultimately it’s the process of defining what it is that makes you actually happy and what ultimately you want in your life in the long & the short. What do you want your life to look like?

For me, good health, adventures and travel, quality time with Jase, my family & friends and a feeling of achievement (in my career & blog, as well as my personal life for example) are key to my  feeling of happiness. So fucking off my career (and the severe stress that I know comes with it), to have a simple life & a low pressure job sounds great at first, but ultimately I know it won’t make me happy forever because I am driven to achieve and so for me, it’s more a case of crafting a balance!

Of course there’s lots of small milestones that will help me achieve these very broad (and not very SMART) goals and there’s also lots of very small habits or rituals which also bring me little bursts of contentedness (my morning coffee is one for example), but generally speaking knowing what it is that makes me happy, means I can spend more time focussing on doing those, and less on the things that don’t, and importantly gain perspective in moments when my happiness or health is being jeopardised.

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Principles For Life.

Once you know the things that fuel your happiness and inner content, you have to start prioritising them. Now this. This god awful principle in itself is one that’s so much easier said than done. Trust me. I’ve written goodness knows how many posts in a  similar vain to this over the years, sharing my journey to get my life back on track and find better balance … and my biggest learning?

I need to take my own advice.

So the next few sentences I say with gritted teeth, because I truly understand that it’s all very well in principle to want to work your contracted hours yet be CEO by the age of 30, go to the gym whilst spending time socialising, set up a successful business alongside smashing your career, be the best girlfriend, sister, daughter and friend, all the while doing the things you want, living the dream and looking like Giselle. It’s laughable.

But, we can help ourselves. And I for one am finally ready to start doing and not just saying. Principles for life are rules, they are binding and should be committed to like your daily teeth brushing routine. They are principles that enable you to achieve your basic happiness. They are the guidelines that will help you achieve your milestones without sacrificing yourself along the way. They’re simple. They’re effective. They should be achievable.

Many successful women turned ‘self help’ authors like Arianna Huffington & Sarah Knight for example have talked about the value of setting life principles or ‘fuck budgets’ if you’re a ‘Life Changing Magic of Not Giving A Fuck’ convert, to help achieve a better balance in life.

Your priorities should be your own, there’s no right and no wrong, but they will help you achieve happiness. For me, ensuring that every working day isn’t spent in the office until 10pm and ensuring extra pressure and stress is going to add value to my career and not just kill me on the way is key. A better commitment and prioritisation of my time will help ensure that being active becomes part of my life, ensure that when I spend time with loved ones it’s quality and not distracted, ensure I have time to travel as much as possible and give quality time to my blog (and ultimately my future) and importantly to ensure that stress is something that is significantly reduced as a result.

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Commitment to You #NotSorry.

Sometimes it requires a little selfishness. An attitude of #NotSorry if you will. But mostly it just requires some commitment to yourself. Focus on your priorities. A commitment to put yourself, your health, and your happiness first.

No one else can do it for you, and this is where i’ve slipped in the past.

Hoping external factors will respect my goals and my personal health and happiness, letting my principles slip once too often and as time goes on, slipping back into that rut and that unbalanced work life balance becoming the norm. Where i’m sat wishing I could just start living the life I want to lead. And promising that tomorrow will be the day.

Well Tomorrow Has Arrived. It’s Time To Start Doing. And Not Just Saying.

I’d absolutely love to hear about your principles for life, if you have any that is? And if you don’t I’d love to know if you can relate in anyway to my experience and my drive to set principles that will hopefully help me live a more balanced life? If you’re looking for more help or inspiration on the topic then have a little browse here.