How To Focus On Yourself & Your Own Blog & End The Comparison Trap
The topic of comparing ones success to another’s is something I’ve touched on lots of times on my blog, whether it’s sharing the reasons why you should stop comparing yourself to others, how to stop or the difficult moments Ive faced on my blogging journey when I’ve allowed self doubt and comparison to take over and how i’ve benefitted from changing my attitude & focussing less on others. It’s a topic I’m passionate about and it’s a topic I feel is super pertinent in the business of blogging.
In an industry blooming so rapidly, it’s easy to admire the work of others and the success they’re achieving and feel left behind and like a failure in comparison. That campaign you didn’t get, those followers you don’t have or that BLOG growth you’re still wishing for. Whatever the point of comparison I’m certain it’s something we all face, especially if you’re a workaholic and always want to achieve the best you can (ahem).
My self doubt is directly driven by comparing my work and successes to others so finding ways to avoid this obsession is something I’ve been working on for a while. I’m not perfect yet, I still have those moments where I feel disheartened by my relative lack of achievements in blogging, but overall I’ve learnt and tried a number of tactics to help me stay focussed on my own journey that I thought I’d share today.
THREE WAYS TO ELIMINATE THE COMPARISON TRAP
Stop Consuming Others Work
This is bold and not something I’ve quite managed to adopt, but it’s something I heard a little while back in a podcast from another blogger and have seen crop up a few times since. The biggest driver of self doubt and criticism is focussing on other people and not yourself. So what if you just completely cut out the others? You’re forced to focus on yourself. You are your only point of comparison. Truth be told I love reading other blogs, so I couldn’t just cut them out, but what I have tried to do is simply read for enjoyment and not for competitor analysis.
Define Your Own Benchmarks
The issue with self comparison is that you lose focus on your own journey. Finding ways to bring the focus back on to you and your own journey is key, and one key way to do that is to set what success means to you, and only focus on measuring that. Very recently I significantly changed my attitude to blogging and in turn my measure of success too … since redefining what success is to me, Ive found myself enjoying blogging more, not getting so down on myself (in fact I’ve had some great ‘successes’ that I might have overlooked in the past) and spending more time working on the future of my blog than that of others.
Accept There’s Room For Everyone
Perhaps one of the most liberating moments in your blogging career will be the moment you truly accept it’s not a competition. Unless you’re looking to take 100% share of all potential readers and views (which even google doesn’t have) then there really is room for everyone and a big enough audience to go around. Liv wrote a lovely post to this vein not long ago, and her words were so true. What will drive your success and help carve your space in this crazy old world is integrity, authenticity and originality. Don’t try and be someone else. Be you. That’s the content and space only you can own.
Read More Tips On This Topic. How To Stop Comparing Your Blog Success To Others . Why I Changed My Attitude To Blogging & How It Helped My Blog Success . Define Your Own Blog Success . What Is Blog Success? . What Makes a Blog Become Successful? .
Do you ever find yourself struggling with self comparison and self doubt as a result? I’d love to hear if these tips have helped you and how you currently cope and try and avoid the comparison trap?
sheridan grady says
These photos are gorgeous! i totally agree with all of your points, there is definitely room for us all! x
http://www.shayholly.co.uk
Neeltje | Thoughts in Style says
Loved this!
http://www.thoughtsinstyle.com/
Abigail says
Love these tips. I really want to focus on my own goals in the upcoming year and need these kinds of reminders!
Abigail Alice x
Charmaine says
The first tip is also what I struggle with, but reading blogs is also my favourite past time so I can’t stop it. :) Great photos and post!
– Charmaine
http://charmainenyw.com
Michelle says
It is always inspirational to read others blogs and points and a good source of knowledge…..but I agree setting your own benchmarks is the key. Love the photos as always. x
Ollyvia Laura says
TOTALLY AGREE WITH YOUR THOUGHT <3
// MY BEAUTY & TRAVEL BLOG //
Margaret says
I like that you include ‘there’s room for everyone’ cus there really is! And yes, sometimes we just get too harsh on ourselves, but that’s okay, we’ve got that time. Just to accept that there’s room for improvement and yet we ourselves are special. Hope you have a nice week!
xx Margaret
http://www.maleemaleehong.com | http://www.facebook.com/maleemaleehong
Aleksandra says
Many writers stop reading when they write their books… May not be that easy in a continuous process like blogging :)
Caitlin Lindquist says
I love your bohemian dress! Super cute. xx Caitlin Dash of Darling
Ellese says
I love these thoughts and so appreciate them. Sometimes I get concerned that I am dreaming too big and will I ever get to the same level as the big bloggers. Then I snap out of it and remind myself that we can all do whatever we believe in! No dream is impossible, and like you said, there is room for everyone. Thanks for sharing dear. Xo, Ellese
Rock.Paper.Glam.
Monika says
Lovely photos!
Love,
http://www.thestyleventure.com/2016/11/14/today/
Harleen says
This is such a great reminder to take a pause and take a breath to enjoy this amazing blogging journey and all it has to offer. Thanks for the share!
– Harleen
My Eunoia | @harleenbola
Hayley says
Loved this post lady, so accurate and some wise words! It really is hard to eliminate that thought of not feeling good enough and focusing on others success rather than you’re own – great post! :)
Hayley xo
http://www.frockmeimfamous.com
tuky says
Ugh, this is definitely a bad habit I fall to constantly… telling myself it’s “self-care” despite knowing the lame trend behind it. Thanks for your helpful post! ?